Now That I Am A Mama...
Roaches. I just can't take them. Braxton and I have lived in two different houses since we have been married, both with yards full of nice, tall trees that happen to breed Satan's spawn, roaches. For the last six years, I have paid $400 a year to try to keep them out of our sweet, cozy, clean home and to try to maintain my sanity. Now, I know that they can't really hurt you but they do carry thousands of diseases, including salmonella. I had a bout with salmonella in seventh grade and was hospitalized for a week. I thought I was dying, my stomach hurt so bad.
Anyway, I am trying to justify my fear/disgust of these things, but really the level of my disgust of them can't be rationalized. But, to try to put it into perspective for you, let me give you some background. I have been known to leave my house if I am home alone and I see one walking around. I have sprayed ONE to its death with Raid and nearly had a heart attack in the process. I have never stepped on one or killed one with a wad of paper towels. I have never even picked up a dead one that I have found. I have gone weeks without stepping in the spot where a roach has been without my shoes on. I would rather have a hundred spiders crawling all over me than have one roach touch me. Crazy, I know. Spiders can actually harm you. But, roaches are just vile.
One particularly traumatizing and slightly humorous (I don't know if Braxton would concur) episode occurred at our last house. We were laying on the couch watching t.v. in the den, when I glanced over into our living room and saw a massive roach crawling up the wall. I alerted Braxton and he sprung into action. He knows the drill and he knows the drama associated with this. I watched Braxton, between my fingers covering my eyes, chase this thing around the living room, down the hall to our master bedroom, all the way back down the hall to the kitchen where (I AM NOT LYING) I see this thing flying around Braxton. As any sane person would do, he was trying to dodge this crazy thing. Somehow, he was finally able to capture it and kill it. I requested a shower for Braxton after the swarming. I can't remember now if he obliged. Anyway, we settle back in to watch t.v. and after awhile Braxton goes into the kitchen to get something to eat. I hear, "Megan, don't come in here." I knew it had to be roach-related. The roach had resurrected itself from the trash can. Unbelievable.
About a month ago, I spotted a roach heading towards the pack and play where Avery was playing peacefully. I was home alone and it was late in the afternoon and Braxton wasn't going to be home for a couple of hours because he had to go to a dinner. So, as my heart is pounding out of my chest, I am devising a plan. I cannot let this thing crawl into the pack and play. I slip on my flip flops and quickly go over and grab Avery. The roach proceeds to saunter back and forth in the den where we are playing just tormenting me. I keep thinking to myself, "Megan, you are a mom now. You have got to step it up and be able to take care of things like this. You don't want to pass this ridiculous fear on to the girls. (Granted, they are way too young to pick up on this, but the day will come) Just kill the thing." I can't bring myself to squish it and I can't decide if the Raid would ruin our hard wood floors and I don't want the babies breathing in all of those fumes. So, I get a decorative box thingy off of one our tables and try to trap the roach under it until Braxton got home. I could never bring myself close enough to the roach to put the box over it. I clearly can't take care of this myself. I pick up the phone and call my mom since Braxton was busy. I asked her if she was near my house and she said "No, but do you need some help with the babies?" And I said, "No, but I do need some help with a roach." She said that she was at work, but that she was leaving in a couple of minutes and that she would come get it for me. I huddled in the corner with the babies as she killed it!
Now, fast forward to this past week. We have had a lot of rain and steamy, hot weather. Apparently, this is the perfect combination for inviting roaches into your home according to my sweet Terminix lady. (Yes, lady. I DON"T know how she does it.) She is wonderful and I have a great relationship with her. I have seen multiple roaches invading my house recently so I called Theresa, my Terminix lady, to come back out to spray. I have been living in a semi-dream world of naivete thinking that roaches only really liked to hang out on floors and walls, but my bubble was rudely burst a couple of days ago when I found one hanging out on the chair in our bedroom. I ran to Braxton to tell him and he took care of it. I am traumatized, but am thankful that the chair has a slipcover than can be washed. A couple of days later, my mom is spending the night with me because Braxton is in Atlanta. Our power went out at about 8:45 p.m. and didn't come back on until about 1:00 a.m. My mom had just gotten in the bed while I was finishing up something. I went into our room with a flashlight and just happened to scan the room as I walked. I had a heart attack when I saw that another roach was in the same spot on the same chair. I yelled, "Mom, what are we (knowing full well that I was not going to be involved in this process) going to do now? We (I) can't go to sleep knowing this thing is in our room." So, my sweet mom gets out of the bed, gets some kleenex and battles this thing for about 5 minutes as I am encouraging her from down the hall, whisper-yelling so that I don't wake the babies. As I am standing there, I am thinking my mom would and does do anything for me, just as I would for Avery and Caroline. It wasn't pleasant for her, but she did it for me because I am her child and that's what mamas do, no matter how old their babies are. So, it's time for me to step it up and try to conquer this fear of roaches because they aren't going anywhere, anytime soon. The babies will start to crawl in the next couple of months and I need to be able to get a roach off of the ground if the situation arises.
Sidenote: Please don't be totally grossed out to come to our house. It is definitely not like this all the time, or I would have already moved to a neighborhood without trees. And I do disinfect all of the areas that I have seen them. We try to keep it clean around here!
Ok, I have officially tainted this sweet blog with words like Satan, roach, and kill. I will have to redeem it with my next post!
Anyway, I am trying to justify my fear/disgust of these things, but really the level of my disgust of them can't be rationalized. But, to try to put it into perspective for you, let me give you some background. I have been known to leave my house if I am home alone and I see one walking around. I have sprayed ONE to its death with Raid and nearly had a heart attack in the process. I have never stepped on one or killed one with a wad of paper towels. I have never even picked up a dead one that I have found. I have gone weeks without stepping in the spot where a roach has been without my shoes on. I would rather have a hundred spiders crawling all over me than have one roach touch me. Crazy, I know. Spiders can actually harm you. But, roaches are just vile.
One particularly traumatizing and slightly humorous (I don't know if Braxton would concur) episode occurred at our last house. We were laying on the couch watching t.v. in the den, when I glanced over into our living room and saw a massive roach crawling up the wall. I alerted Braxton and he sprung into action. He knows the drill and he knows the drama associated with this. I watched Braxton, between my fingers covering my eyes, chase this thing around the living room, down the hall to our master bedroom, all the way back down the hall to the kitchen where (I AM NOT LYING) I see this thing flying around Braxton. As any sane person would do, he was trying to dodge this crazy thing. Somehow, he was finally able to capture it and kill it. I requested a shower for Braxton after the swarming. I can't remember now if he obliged. Anyway, we settle back in to watch t.v. and after awhile Braxton goes into the kitchen to get something to eat. I hear, "Megan, don't come in here." I knew it had to be roach-related. The roach had resurrected itself from the trash can. Unbelievable.
About a month ago, I spotted a roach heading towards the pack and play where Avery was playing peacefully. I was home alone and it was late in the afternoon and Braxton wasn't going to be home for a couple of hours because he had to go to a dinner. So, as my heart is pounding out of my chest, I am devising a plan. I cannot let this thing crawl into the pack and play. I slip on my flip flops and quickly go over and grab Avery. The roach proceeds to saunter back and forth in the den where we are playing just tormenting me. I keep thinking to myself, "Megan, you are a mom now. You have got to step it up and be able to take care of things like this. You don't want to pass this ridiculous fear on to the girls. (Granted, they are way too young to pick up on this, but the day will come) Just kill the thing." I can't bring myself to squish it and I can't decide if the Raid would ruin our hard wood floors and I don't want the babies breathing in all of those fumes. So, I get a decorative box thingy off of one our tables and try to trap the roach under it until Braxton got home. I could never bring myself close enough to the roach to put the box over it. I clearly can't take care of this myself. I pick up the phone and call my mom since Braxton was busy. I asked her if she was near my house and she said "No, but do you need some help with the babies?" And I said, "No, but I do need some help with a roach." She said that she was at work, but that she was leaving in a couple of minutes and that she would come get it for me. I huddled in the corner with the babies as she killed it!
Now, fast forward to this past week. We have had a lot of rain and steamy, hot weather. Apparently, this is the perfect combination for inviting roaches into your home according to my sweet Terminix lady. (Yes, lady. I DON"T know how she does it.) She is wonderful and I have a great relationship with her. I have seen multiple roaches invading my house recently so I called Theresa, my Terminix lady, to come back out to spray. I have been living in a semi-dream world of naivete thinking that roaches only really liked to hang out on floors and walls, but my bubble was rudely burst a couple of days ago when I found one hanging out on the chair in our bedroom. I ran to Braxton to tell him and he took care of it. I am traumatized, but am thankful that the chair has a slipcover than can be washed. A couple of days later, my mom is spending the night with me because Braxton is in Atlanta. Our power went out at about 8:45 p.m. and didn't come back on until about 1:00 a.m. My mom had just gotten in the bed while I was finishing up something. I went into our room with a flashlight and just happened to scan the room as I walked. I had a heart attack when I saw that another roach was in the same spot on the same chair. I yelled, "Mom, what are we (knowing full well that I was not going to be involved in this process) going to do now? We (I) can't go to sleep knowing this thing is in our room." So, my sweet mom gets out of the bed, gets some kleenex and battles this thing for about 5 minutes as I am encouraging her from down the hall, whisper-yelling so that I don't wake the babies. As I am standing there, I am thinking my mom would and does do anything for me, just as I would for Avery and Caroline. It wasn't pleasant for her, but she did it for me because I am her child and that's what mamas do, no matter how old their babies are. So, it's time for me to step it up and try to conquer this fear of roaches because they aren't going anywhere, anytime soon. The babies will start to crawl in the next couple of months and I need to be able to get a roach off of the ground if the situation arises.
Sidenote: Please don't be totally grossed out to come to our house. It is definitely not like this all the time, or I would have already moved to a neighborhood without trees. And I do disinfect all of the areas that I have seen them. We try to keep it clean around here!
Ok, I have officially tainted this sweet blog with words like Satan, roach, and kill. I will have to redeem it with my next post!
posted by Megan Weimer at
9:21 AM
5 Comments:
Ok, I seriously just rolled on the floor laughing through your entire post!! I feel the same way about roaches AND spiders! And, the part about avoiding the spot while barefoot...I do that too!!! Ugh!!! SO sorry! But Honey, I guess as long as we live in the South we'll have to put up with these annoying little pests!!
Megan, I am dying over here. Seriously. I had no idea that we shared this fear. Honestly I don't think I can even bring myself to kill one (or step near it). I will evacuate before I do that and I will probably be crying/hyperventilating as I evacuate. I would gladly take spiders crawling all over me before one roach. I think I might be traumatized from growing up in Florida with those BIG huge ones. Yick.
This is so you!!! I'm not at all surprised... hilarious!
I remember you having the same fear as me. They. are. so. GROSS. But spiders don't bother me a bit! They scare the crap out of Trey though! Fortunately, for me, where we live we don't ever have roaches but have tons and tons of spiders. HIlarious post.
Megan,
I know how you feel, when I was pregnant with Joshua we found a snake in our backyard. Sarah ran and got on top of their swing set, Rachel and Mary got on top of their bunk beds. I ran and called a neighbor boy to come and kill it for me.
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home